Mikael Jansson/British Vogue
Sophie Turner is opening up about her painful split with Joe Jonas in the new issue of British Vogue.
The couple made headlines when he filed for divorce in September after four years of marriage.
The exes share two daughters, Willa and Delphine, and Turner was painted as a partier in the media after the breakup.
Now, she tells British Vogue that those were “the worst few days of my life.”
At the time, her kids were in the States while she was shooting “Joan” in the U.K.
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“I remember I was on set, I was contracted to be on set for another two weeks, so I couldn’t leave,” she explained, “My kids were in the States and I couldn’t get to them because I had to finish 'Joan.' And all these articles started coming out… It hurt because I really do completely torture myself over every move I make as a mother – mum guilt is so real! I just kept having to say to myself, ‘None of this is true. You are a good mum and you’ve never been a partier.’”
She admitted, "There were some days that I didn’t know if I was going to make it. I would call my lawyer saying ‘I can’t do this. I just can’t.’ I was just never strong enough to stand up for myself. And then, finally, after two weeks of me being in a rut, she reminded me that it was my children I was fighting for."
Sophie added, "Once anyone says to me, ‘Do it for your kids,’ I’m doing it. I wouldn’t do it for myself, but I’ll find the strength for them.”
The ”Game of Thrones” alum continued, “I mean, it’s unfathomable the amount of people that will just make s**t up and put it up based on a picture. A picture might tell a thousand words, but it’s not my story. It felt like I was watching a movie of my life that I hadn’t written, hadn’t produced, or starred in. It was shocking. I’m still in shock.”
Turner explained, “I’m unhappy with the way everything played out, especially when it comes to my children. They’re the victims in all of this. But I think we’re doing the best we can. I’m confident that we can figure it out. Joe is a great father to our children and that’s all I can ask for.”
Looking to the future, she hopes they can still be one big happy family. “My dream is to have a huge Christmas where my daughters can have their dad there,” Sophie said. “Joe’s whole side of the family, their grandparents. I don’t care about the politics, I just want the girls to feel loved and have everyone show up for them.”
Gushing over Willa and Delphine, she added, “They’re so much fun, total girly girls and absolute rays of sunshine in my life.”
Mikael Jansson/British Vogue
Another ray of sunshine in her life is Taylor Swift. The singer, who once dated Jonas, is often spotted with Sophie amid her divorce.
“Taylor was an absolute hero to me this year,” she said, adding, “I’ve never been more grateful to anyone than I am for her because she took my children and me, and provided us with a home and a safe space. She really has a heart of gold.”
Looking back at her relationship with Joe, she recalled how he DM-ed her on Instagram.
“It was really surreal, like a fever dream,” she shared. “Because he was older than me, I just felt like I was really taken care of, to the point I came back home and didn’t know how to do anything for myself.”
Turner said partnering up with a JoBro gave her a "plus one" feeling.
“There was a lot of attention on the three brothers, and the wives," she recalled. "Well, we were always called the wives, and I hated that. It was kind of this plus-one feeling. And that’s nothing to do with him – in no way did he make me feel that – it was just that the perception of us was as the groupies in the band.”
Now, she's moved on and is dating again. “I am having fun dating," Sophie said. "It’s very fun. I mean, it’s strange when you get married so young. It’s like you never really learn how to date. So it’s all very new to me,”
The June issue of British Vogue is available via digital download and on newsstands from May 21.
